Communicating With Family – How to Let a Family Member Know They Hurt You

Anyone can hurt us, that is inevitable. But getting hurt by our own family member, whom we completely trust, doubles the pain. It’s not only the unpleasant action or the mistake committed that causes us to despair, but prevalently, the thought that we never expected someone of our own blood can hurt us. Nevertheless, we need to forgive because, despite it all, we are in one family. We can choose our friends, we can choose our partners, but we can never choose our family. As cliché as it is, blood will always be thicker than water.

But, how do we forgive, forget, and move on from a hurtful situation?

Unless until the feeling will be revealed, and all the bitterness will be poured out, we will always keep the grudge inside us that could soon break our good relationship toward each other. Proper communication is the key to getting things back to the way they used to be.

It is definitely hard to properly get our message across when we are filled with emotions and are deeply hurting. But there is no easy way to fix the broken things. If we want to find peace and live in love with each other again, we have to face each dispute with mindfulness and boldness of heart. We need to expose the wound so it can be treated.

If we have practiced open communication within the family, this wouldn’t be too hard to do. Opening up can be a breeze by way of voicing out the grievances right where and when it happens. It may flare up an argument but the honesty and bluntness of words can solve whatever misunderstandings right there and then. It shortens the time of feeling the pain and eliminates the growth of hate.

But there are simply instances when the wound is too deep and we find it hard to speak and let our grievances be known. Sometimes, it needs a little more courage and effort to confront. Pouring out our raging emotions through writing is the best way to deal with it. By writing our thoughts first, we can assess our words and weigh down heavy outpourings so as not to cause too much havoc. We need to keep in mind that the purpose for airing out our affliction is to ease the pain and cure the wound – not to amplify the dispute.

Open communication is very important in a family to keep the relationship healthy and strong. It doesn’t matter whether the plight is small or extensive, if it’s hurting us, we need to let each other know. Keeping a few grudges in ourselves is like letting a few vermin live in our house. They can multiply, and we will only notice it when they’ve already caused great devastation into our homes.


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